Thoughts – Our Greatest Addiction !? by Mary Allen

Every thought we think creates a biochemical response in our bodies.  These reactions vary from negligible to intense. Science has known this for some time.  If we think about food, our saliva glands may be stimulated.  When we think of the person that irritates us most, our bodies constrict and tense up.  When we reflect upon our most fulfilling moments, endorphins are released in our bodies and we feel more relaxed and at peace.  Every memory, whether positive or negative, elicits an internal physical response.  When a sexual thought crosses our mind, well…you know what can happen biologically.  But, I’ll keep this article G-rated…you get the idea.  With every thought, there is a bio-chemical response in our body.

The impact of the thought on our nervous systems ranges in intensity, according to the level of “emotion” associated with the thought.  For example, reflecting on the death of a love one, is likely to create a deeper emotional response than remembering to buy toothpaste or noticing you stepped on an ant.  The more intense the emotion, the greater the impact the thought has on the physical body and the more likely we may become addicted to it.

Thoughts don’t require an external stimulus to be elicited, which means we can indulge in any thought repeatedly – at any time we choose.

As human beings we experience and enjoy a VARIETY of emotions on a daily basis, yet we also innately seek FAMILIARITY…even if it’s NOT positive.  The emotions we experience consistently become a part of our comfort zones and our identities…as they are habitually conditioned into our lives.  Until we get conscious about them we remain victims to these patterns.

How CONSCIOUS are you in “choosing” your thoughts?  How conscious are you of the emotional patterns that are running our lives?  What thoughts and emotions are you addicted to?  The quickest way to evaluate this for yourself is to take inventory by noticing the emotions you experience repeatedly throughout the week.  These are the emotions your body has grown accustomed to experiencing…and unconsciously works to elicit.

Anger, stress, anxiety, fear, depression, sadness, overwhelm, frustration, guilt, and worry may be a few of the thought/emotional patterns to investigate more closely.  Behind every emotion is a thought or set of thoughts.  This is how they continue to be conditioned. If stress is a common pattern in your life, you may have thoughts such as, “_______needs to be accomplished before I can relax.”  Or, “I have too much to do.” Or, “I can’t get it all done.”  If depression is something you experience, something as basic as, “I feel depressed” may be the thought feeding the emotion.  We may have one or multiple thoughts feeding an addictive pattern.

You may also experience a variety of positive or empowering emotions also.  Love, joy, happiness, peace, excitement, pleasure, playfulness and a sense of purpose are a few.  Investigating the thoughts associated with empowering emotions is useful because we can learn to strengthen and intensify these, which gives us more fulfillment, power, results and connection.

As we understand the nature of thought, and these unconscious addictions, we can begin to more CONSCIOUSLY strengthen thoughts that serve and empower us — and reduce the impact of the thoughts and emotional patterns that are debilitating.

THE PAYOFF

One of the ways we can break addictions to thoughts and emotional patterns that don’t serve us is to look at the “payoff”.  We continue to overwork an emotional muscle because at some level we subconsciously believe that it serves us in some way.  A “payoff” is a perceived benefit we receive when we engage the emotional pattern.

We may use ANGER because we notice that people pay attention to us more closely with this intense emotion, thus connecting with us and our ideas more.  We may connect to DEPRESSION because it may prevent us from failing if we try…or maybe it allows us to connect to others who share a similar story.  We may enjoy STRESS or ANXIETY because we believe it’s what drives our motivation and we fear we’d be less productive if we eliminated it.  We may be addicted to GUILT because that means we care.  We may wallow in thoughts of ROMANCE because it gives us hope.

Unfortunately, the benefit we subconsciously believe we’re receiving, is generally NOT really giving us the FULL BENEFIT we desire.  For example, with ANGER…are people REALLY paying more attention?  Are they connecting with us and our ideas in the manner we truly desire?  When we’re STRESSED and ANXIOUS are we really MORE productive or less productive?  Is GUILT, the most effective way to demonstrate that we care?  Does DEPRESSION keep us safe from failing, or do we experience a greater sense of failure in the state of depression.  With virtually EVERY dis-empowering emotion there is a false payoff we subconsciously connect to, and that keeps us locked unconsciously in this addictive pattern.

However, if we slow down and question this logically, we’ll quickly see that the payoff isn’t really giving us what we’re seeking.  When we do this, the mind has a way of releasing its grip on that thought.  Thus, creating room for a new emotional and thought pattern that can serve us better.

SOULFUL Challenge:  Increase your AWARENESS around the most dominant thoughts that you experience throughout your week.  Pay close attention to the emotional patterns that aren’t empowering you.  Identify the thoughts or set of thoughts that are driving the emotion.  See if you can find the subconscious “payoff” or benefit that allows you to indulge in this pattern, and see if it’s REALLY giving you what you desire.  You may experience the pattern diminishing or vanishing completely.

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A 365 Goal by Mary Allen

What?  A 365 day goal?  Yes.  A 365 day goal is a year long commitment you make to yourself as a resolution with an ongoing commitment.

Every year we set a variety of goals.  Some can be achieved in a week, month, or quarter.  Some goals take several years to realize.  There is another category of goals that can only be achieved through consistent daily (or nearly daily) action.   Working out, flossing teeth, meditating or reading books are examples of worthy “daily habits” or “daily rituals” or “365 day goals.”  The 365 day goal may also be something you decide to give up, much like many Catholics do during lent.  Examples could be giving up swearing, alcohol, candy or a favorite unhealthy food.  The result of your 365 day goal should deliver a positive effect in your life by its exclusion or inclusion — and by your year-long commitment.

These 365 day type of goals are important for TWO reasons.  First, we get the positive “compounding effect” of a simple discipline repeated over the course of a year.  Secondly, we get to experience “discipline” for the sake of discipline.  Cultivating will-power brings a sense of control and power, while it also tames the ego.  Many spiritual practices encourage a simple discipline practice for this reason.  It forces you to make deliberate and conscious choices throughout the year about that single discipline.  And, the compounding effect delivers more value than otherwise random follow through.  So, it’s a double win.

This year, my 365 day goal is “no French fries.”  Yep.  So far, so good, no fries for Mary.  Now, I don’t really eat fries THAT often (maybe 2-3x a month), but I do love them — especially when they’re good ones!!  And, I know they aren’t good for me.  And, I’ll be stepping into a wedding dress in a few months.  And, I love making a 365 day goal.  This one seemed like the perfect one for me this year.

Another year, I committed to giving up Diet Coke, because I was drinking about three to four a day.  After the first two weeks, it was easy.  Since then (1992), I’ve probably only less than a dozen sodas.  Some goals become permanent, and others are just a one year commitment.  Anything that I start to notice as a pattern in my life, that doesn’t serve me, I like to nip because I don’t like being controlled by something outside of me.

One year, Tony Robbins committed to working out EVERY day…and found himself on the exercise bike at 2am on some days.  While he got in great shape that year…he also got the power of discipline.  And, a great story to share.

You may also quantify your goal differently, to be more achievable, such as committing to working out four or five days a week (on average) for an entire year.  The goal ought to stretch you, but still be doable.  Here’s a list of ideas to get your juices flowing.  I’m sure you can add to this list.  Don’t feel that you must do ALL or ANY of these…the point is to commit to ONE for a whole year — one that is perfect for YOU.    Focusing on too many 365 day goals is counterproductive.  Find something that resonates for you…and commit, really commit!!  What would be the impact 365 days from now if you…?

• Meditate Daily (a true 365 day goal — no exceptions)
• No Chocolate or Candy
• No TV (or 2 hours per week max…and really hold yourself to it)
• Average 5 workouts per week
• Floss Daily
• Say “I love you” to spouse or loved one
• No swearing
• Read 30 Books (I did that one year…and found myself reading 10 books in December!)
• No alcohol (one friend did this…and loved how he felt, so never started again)
• Save $_____per month (no matter what)
• Write down 25 Appreciations each day
• No French Fries or Fried Food
• No pasta
• No breads
• No Ice Cream
• Vitamins Daily
• Walk dog daily (somebody furry will love this one)
• Make bed daily
• Wash dishes daily
• No fast food
• Yoga or stretching daily
• An act of kindness daily (you can always visit Denny’s a midnight to find people to be kind too)
• No complaining
• No gossiping
• Write in journal daily
• Express “appreciation” to spouse daily
• Hug at least one person daily
• No soda (I know some of you NEED to do this one)
• No coffee (replace with Green Tea)
• No cheese or no dairy
• No red meat
• Read 10 pages of a good book daily
• Writing daily (great for writers!)
• Calling a loved one daily
• Visualizing a goal daily
• Sending yourself unconditional love
• Purposefully feeling JOY daily

Have fun with this.  I’m missing my French fries, but I have to admit I feel GREAT when I’ve “just said no.” Feel free to share with me your commitment for the year, and maybe you’ll inspire other readers by your 365 day goal.

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End of Year Completion by Mary Allen

Sometime between now and the end of the year, set aside some interrupted time to journal your answers to the questions below.  I personally like to curl up next to a warm fire, light candles and get comfy, allowing plenty of time to reflect upon the year coming to an end. Give yourself this gift this year.  It’s a powerful way to complete and acknowledge your year. 

1. What are your disappointments, failures, and breakdowns? Let’s acknowledge what these items are….this is an opportunity to let them go, carry them forward, or make a new promise.

2. Make a second list titled: Successes, Wins and Accomplishments. This is a chance to celebrate and own who you have become this year, and your achievements. Where did you step into your power and greatness? Please don’t skimp on these. The little stuff counts. NO modesty allowed. Let’s validate all your accomplishments. Look through your organizer to remind you.

3. What have you learned about yourself and your life? What insights have you gained? True insights have the transformational capability of shifting us into a new, more alive place! As we are blessed with insights it is important to nurture and deepen these new understandings.

4. What are you grateful for? This list might include some of the above and anything else you truly appreciate about yourself or any other area of your life. There is a basic principle. Whatever you appreciate and give thanks for will increase in your life.

(For this question… I like to be REALLY thorough, counting the big and little things I’m truly grateful for. That means don’t limit to yourself to ONE page.)

5. How will you celebrate and honor your year 2011 accomplishments? What would be a fun, special thing to do for yourself?

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9 Ways to Create More Energy in Your Life By Eliminating Tolerations

Wish you could double the amount of energy and time you have in a day?

Ever feel sluggish and bogged down, finding it difficult keep sanity and success soaring?

If you’re ready to feel more energized, creative and productive, then today’s feature is for you.  You’re about to learn one of the best-kept secrets to my clients’ success.  This simple idea, when applied, guarantees to radically free up your energy, cluttered mind and stress quotient so you can maximize your productivity and inner peace.

Every industry has its own jargon, and so does the industry of coaching.  If you’re not already familiar with the concept of “tolerations,” let me do the honors and share why dedicating time each week eliminating tolerations, is one of the most life-transforming commitments you can make!

What is a Toleration??

A Toleration is something you’ve been putting up with, putting off or not dealing with — that drains your energy.  It could be as simple as a button missing off your favorite shirt, a cluttered desk, or thank you cards you’ve been meaning to send.  When that “something” isn’t handled, just thinking about it zaps your already depleted energy.

Some “tolerations” are small and could be handled quickly, but get put off because they’re not urgent.  Procrastination is the breeding ground of “tolerations.”  There is also a TIME component to Tolerations.  The longer a “pesky little task” is “not handled,” the more energy is drained.

Tolerations come in all shapes and sizes.  Writing them down on a list is the first step in addressing these energy vampires and freeing up precious energy.

Let’s help you take inventory of 9 types of “tolerations” in your life, so you can start tackling them – one at a time, and create more energy in your life.  I’ve included examples to get you thinking.

1.  Clutter, Cleanliness and Organization is a big one!  Take a look at the piles of papers on your desk, overstuffed closets, messy drawers, refrigerator, dirty car (inside or outside), messy garage, etc.

2.  What needs fixing?  Are your electronics working?  Cell phone, stereo, computer?  Lighting in office?  Button missing from favorite shirt? Shoes needing polish?  Scan your office and home environments? Is anything broken???

3.  Maintenance Items.   Oil changed in car, teeth cleaned, light bulb replaced, clothes to dry cleaner, AC or Heat serviced, battery replaced in phone or clock, schedule haircut, etc.

4.  Unfinished Projects or Lingering To-Do’s.  Thank you notes to send, a proposal or presentation to prepare, shopping for X, update resume, sign up for Toastmasters, etc.

5.  Comfort Items.  What are you tolerating in your environment that’s affecting your comfort?  Example: Not having enough heat in the office (solution: new heater, or clothes to dress more warmly), no A/C (Solution: buy one, get a fan, wear shorts), loud working environment (Solution: noise-canceling headphones)

6.  Relationship Tolerations.   Does someone needlessly swearing, gossiping or over-doing sarcasm to the point of annoyance?   Does someone leave socks on ground, toilet seat up or wet towels on the bed?  Is your spouse constantly criticizing, whiney or withholds affection?  How do address relationship tolerations? Make a request. Set a boundary. Shift your mindset. Get support.

7.  Bad Habits.  Yes, sometimes we tolerate our own bad habits, which interferes with productivity and deeper fulfillment.  Examples: Watching too much TV, smoking, caffeine addiction, excessive alcohol, being late to appointments, oversleeping, staying up late, indulging in negative thoughts, etc.

8.  Health Issues. Not attending to your health is another type of toleration. Examples: Healing an injury, losing weight, not exercising, not having the right foods on hand, skipping meals, postponing a mammogram or other important medical exams, etc.

9.  BIGGER Tolerations.  This last category is for those nagging issues that don’t quite fit into the others, and generally aren’t simple fixes.  Examples: A challenging boss, client or co-worker; a chronic injury or illness, losing that last 10-20 pounds, cramped office space, not enough closet space, etc.   For BIGGER Tolerations you’ll need to get more creative, enlist support or think outside the box.  Still recognizing any “toleration” allows your subconscious to start attracting a solution.

Before you pull out your sheet of paper, and start writing, here’s another secret.  It’s not about handling ALL of your tolerations at once. That would be overwhelming!  Instead, simply focus on 1-5 tolerations to handle each week.  Just handling one per week for a year is 52 energy-draining tolerations done!

Coaching Assignment:

1.  Brainstorm 20-25 Tolerations present in your life.  What are the pesky little “undone” things draining your energy? Use the categories above to help you identify your pesky energy drains.  To make this super easy for you, download your Tolerations Worksheet here: http://www.lifecoachmary.com/tolerations.pdf

2.  Select 2-5 Tolerations that you’ll tackle THIS week.  Look over your list.  See which one or two “tolerations” would free up the most energy.  Start there.

Remember, it’s not about handling all the Tolerations TODAY.  Focus on the top 1-5 each week.  Progress happens over time.  Your “Tolerations List” should free you up, not bog you down.  NOTE:  Often “tolerations” start getting handled almost automatically once they are identified.

Clients who consistently commit to handling a few tolerations weekly, quickly discover how simple it is to free up energy.  Commit to eliminating “tolerations” each week.  Soon it will become a life habit you’ll be thanking me for.  Mark my words.

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Dancing with Drama by Mary Allen

I admit it. Over the last couple months, I’ve noticed the “drama quotient” in my life at an all-time recent  high.  This is VERY peculiar because my life, for the most part, is pretty drama-free.  But, everything life dishes out is a gift.  The extra drama has had me become more curious about how we create it, attract it and dance with it.  Eventually finding our way back to inner peace, and radically less drama.

So we’re all on the same page, let’s get clear about what drama is.  The best dictionary definition for the kind of drama I’m speaking of is: “a situation or sequence of events that is highly emotional, tragic, or turbulent.”

You know what I’m talking about, right?

Misunderstandings in relationships.  Divorce. Polarizing arguments over political issues.  Domestic violence. Negotiating agreements. Uncertainty. Miscommunications. BIG life-altering decisions. Firing. Hiring. Lay-offs. Family conflicts. Physical injury and disease. Financial pressure. Betrayal.  Fear. Outrage.

One of our most recent dramas involved a domestic violence case with our neighbors, who live above us.  John and I testified in court a couple weeks ago, to help “her” get a restraining order.  It was NOT granted.  Most of the legit evidence was thrown out for technical reasons. Truly crazy. Her testimony explained what we’d heard during the last 4 months, including loud thuds, crying and yelling. After the hearing, she moved out.  But, then HE moved back in!  Yikes! The lawyer said THAT wouldn’t happen.  Now, is our safety in jeopardy? This is just ONE of the dramas present in our lives.

Countless forms of drama-provoking situations exist. And, as Law of Attraction goes, the more you step into the energy of “drama,” the more “drama” you attract and the more intense the emotions. Whew!!

It’s not news that our culture loves drama, spending hours watching adrenaline soaring movies and TV, reading emotionally riveting novels, and engaging in conversations that intensify emotions of all kinds. Many people attract “real-life” drama in their everyday lives mirroring what’s on TV!  Yikes again!

Why are we so attracted to drama?

1.  Distraction.  First off, drama is a fabulous distraction that takes us outside of ourselves.   If I can focus on my friend’s divorce, the neighbor’s domestice violence case, or the latest episode of CSI: Miami or Bachelor Pad, the focus is OUTSIDE of me and effectively numbs any of my own turbulent emotions by externalizing them.  Sometimes it’s just good entertainment.  But, more often, focusing on drama occupies our attention, so we don’t have to go within and confront our own dysfunctional thoughts, behaviors and attitudes.

2. Drama Forces Us To Feel.  There is something cathartic about feeling emotions, even if we’re displacing the true source.  When my 15 1/2 year old Golden Retriever Rugby died, I was a wreck for a week, then stuffed my emotions so I could focus on my business and effectively serve clients.  A couple months later, they were still bottled up. So I rented “Marley and Me,” to allow myself to reconnect to those feelings of grief.  Sure enough… it worked! By focusing on the drama of the movie, I re-connected to my own feelings. Sobbing helped me heal.

3.  Divine Guidance. Because emotions capture our attention during intense situations, drama CAN become the most fertile ground for learning life’s biggest lessons.  Can you point to one of your most “drama-filled” periods and see how it was pivotal to your growth?  While we’re not necessarily consciously choosing drama, sometimes I believe our soul’s attract it, so we can learn key lessons.  Think of it as a necessary “spiritual nudge.”

The Cost of Drama

Like stress, most people accept drama as a part of everyday life, and barely notice what the devastating costs are.  How does drama impact your life? 

Is it impairing your ability to focus or be productive?  Is it interfering with your ability to connect with a loved one?  Is it affecting your food choices or alcohol intake?

One thing for sure, adrenaline rises with drama.  This directly affects cortisol in your system, which is the hormone that correllates with stress.

Personally, I HATE that feeling over long periods of time.  (Though it’s fun to experience while watching movies!)

How to Dance with Drama.

If you’re noticing the drama quotient is extra high in your life, here are a few things you can do to reduce it’s impact and maximize its benefits.

1. What’s REALLY going on?  You may need to reflect on this inquiry a bit to determine the truest answer to this question.  Look for the most objective perspective, which is often the most simple.  Are you wanting to avoid your own feelings?  Do you find it difficult to “be with” another’s discord?  Are you feeling helpless in resolving a situation?

2. What thoughts are you attaching to?  This question helps clarify what’s really going on because typically our thoughts dictate our feelings, and point to “what’s really going on.”

Example: Resistance to friend’s divorce.
Belief: Love doesn’t last.  Maybe MY relationship won’t last. They were a perfect couple. I’m suppose to prevent this.

Example: Neighbor not granted restraining order. Belief: He’s going to harm me or a loved one because I testified against him in court. The justice system is not fair. We have to move ASAP.  I’m not safe.

Example: Polarized Reactions to Manifesto for Conscious Women.  Belief: People won’t like or trust me any more.  I’m a horrible communicater.  People are in pain (and I can’t do anything about it.) Nothing I say makes a difference.

Example: Discord in Relationship.
Belief:  Our relationship will never be the same again.  I should be able to help.  They don’t understand their impact.  The relationship should be closer. They don’t understand me.

When we attach to certain thoughts, we create suffering for ourselves.  And, many of these drama-expanding thoughts aren’t necessarily grounded in reality.  I know how much I want to help in sticky situations.  And, it’s not always my place to do so.  Believing it’s “my job” can be very debilitating.

I’m NOT saying we should minimize certain thoughts like “I’m not safe.”  I can’t know for sure what my neighbor will do or not.  But, knowing this is the thought I’m believing, I can take smart actions without dwelling on the thought 24/7.

3.  Consciously choose thoughts to create more alignment with reality.  Refocusing our thoughts goes a long way in reducing the resistance inherant in drama.

Here are a few ideas to get you thinking about alternative possibilities.

* Maybe things are perfect the way they are (and I just can’t see it yet).
* Maybe this is the catalyst for something higher to evolve.
* Maybe emotional turbulence is serving me or others right now.
* Maybe it’s not my job to fix the situation.
* This situation doesn’t have anything to do with me.
* My only job is to hold the highest outcome for all.
* Everyone is whole, resourceful and creative.
* I am safe right now.

4.  Practice Calming the Mind. Give yourself a moment away from the chaos, and relax into your beingness.  Meditate.  Breathe.  Do yoga.  Go for a walk. Lie in the grass. Allow yourself to find peace, even though there are emotional turbulent situations in your world.  Focus on your well-being in the moment, independent of thoughts, feelings and external circumstances.  A calm mind helps put things in perspective.  Without our attention on “the situation” (like when we sleep)…we can relax into the truth of “all is well.”  At least for THIS moment.

5.  Set Boundaries.  And, take care of YOU!  Just because you have 5 friends in emotionally challenging situations, doesn’t mean you need to be at their beck and call 24/7.  One of the best drama-busters is boundaries.

As you hold your friends as capable, you empower them to sort through their situation without it wreaking havoc on your own nervous system.

Not saying you shouldn’t be there for friends. But, I am saying it’s essential for you to take care of you first.  Remember what they say on airplanes?  Put the oxygen mask on yourself first.  If you’re trying to support your friend from a depleted place, you’ll be of less help and you may end up resenting your friend later.

And again, even if you have LOTS of energy to jump into the drama-pool with others, doesn’t mean it’s your job.  Maybe the drama is in your life to help YOU get better at setting boundaries.

6.  What’s the lesson for you?  Drama is a fabulous distraction.  It’s easy to blame external situations for the emotional turmoil, AND there is almost always a lesson in it for you.

Go within.

Is your friend’s divorce a wake-up call for your relationship?  Do you need to master setting boundaries and “just say no” to drama?  Is there a feeling or emotion you’re avoiding because you’re going through a big transition?  Is there an opportunity to “be with” turmoil in a new way without manipulating circumstances?

And here’s one of the juiciest places to explore.  Is there a shadow quality you haven’t owned yet?

Example: My friend seems overly controlling.  Can I find all the overt and covert ways I’m controlling?

Example: I’m not getting what I want from a relationship.  How am I unconsciously resisting what they ARE giving me?  How am I NOT giving what they need in relationship?

Note: For more information about “shadow work” I recommend Debbie Ford’s book “The Dark Side of the Light Chasers” and my book “The Power of Inner Choice” (Lesson #11).

7.  Watch Your Language.  Language intensifies emotions.  And remember, like attracts like.  It can be cathartic to talk about volatile situations in our lives, AND it can also put fuel on the flames!!

When I talk about testifying in court, and all the stomach-churling details about our neighbor’s domestic violence case, I notice my heart starts beating faster, and the flood of fear and frustration pours in.  (I also notice it’s exciting to talk about, since domestic violence cases aren’t typically happening in the apartment above us!)

But, as I allow more and more time to pass between conversations, my inner peace quotient equalizes and I feel better.

8. Intention.  The best drama-deflater for me has always been intention.  After you’ve seriously taken inventory of what’s going on and combed the field for priceless lessons, it may be time to set a clear intention of a drama-free life.  If you’re like me, who thrives on inner peace and stillness, this can happen quickly.

However, if you’ve been addicted to drama for awhile, this may take time and support. MOST people with high drama-quotients have it for a reason.  They aren’t wanting to face something within themselves or in a relationship.  If you suspect this may be you, reach out to an experienced coach or therapist for expert support. It’s often easier to “go within” and “confront challenging situations” when you have someone to hold your hand.

Final Note:  I don’t believe eliminating drama 100% is the goal.  Life has its ups and downs.  And, let’s face it, drama in movies, TV and books can be quite entertaining.  That being said, my wish for you is to see and embrace the drama in your life in a new light that can serve you, not control you.  Here’s to less drama and more inner peace.

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What are you most attached to?

Question of the day…

What are you most attached to?

How do you loosen your attachments?

I would love to know! Please share your comments below!

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Inner Peace with 7 Keys to Transforming Thought – #7 Redirect Focus and Replace It

7.  SCRAMBLE the Thought –Tony Robbins and NLP practitioners know of this powerful tool, and it’s simple for anyone to use by themselves.  You simply must be WILLING to try it.  If you’ve been embracing a negative mantra over and over in your mind, simply recognizing its impact may not be enough.  Let’s take a mantra like, “I have so much to do”.  To scramble this sentence, or any other, do the following.

• Say the sentence 5 times really fast in a MICKEY MOUSE voice (yes, I’m serious).
• Say the sentence 5 times really slow in a COWBOY’S voice.
• Say the sentence 5 times is your most SENSUAL and SEDUCTIVE voice.
• Say the sentence 5 times BACKWARDS (i.e. “Do to much so have I”).

You must play FULL OUT.  If you’re playing full-out, you’ll find yourself laughing out loud.  Just continue until you’ve made it all the way through the 4 steps above.  When you’re done, notice how you feel about the original sentence.  Most people experience the sentence as neutral or humorous after completing this exercise.  The addictive thought has been transformed.  Try it!!

Replace It. As you loosen the grips on the thoughts that don’t serve you, it’s important to replace them with something more empowering – so the thoughts don’t have a home to return to.  Consciously choosing the antithesis of the original thought is a simple solution.  Another way to find a replacement is to turn the statement around. Identifying a thought that is “as true” or “truer” than the original statement.  Or it may simply align more with what you want to create or attract into your life.  In the example above, “I have too much to do”, could be transformed into, “I’m on track”, or “It’s all going to get done”.  As long as the replacement is more powerful than the unresourceful, you’re on track.

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Inner Peace with 7 Keys to Transforming Thought – #6 Redirect Focus

6.  Redirect Focus – Our minds are like children.  Whatever you place in front of them becomes the focus of their reality.  When caught up in addictive thoughts, consciously redirect your focus on something more positive or neutral.  If your spouse is running late, embrace the beauty in your environment.  If you find yourself frustrated in traffic, focus on your breathing, music in the car or the opportunity to relax and slow down.  LANGUAGE is a powerful means of redirecting your focus.  Consider shifting your internal dialog.  Choose words that empower you over words that

deplete your energy.

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Inner Peace with 7 Keys to Transforming Thought – #5 Just Let Go

5. Just Let Go. Sometimes unresourceful thoughts arise, and we can simply let them go because they don’t serve us.  The inner critic may say, “Who are you to think you can do that?” or “This isn’t going to work”, or “What if you fail?” Maybe the thought is trivial negativity or fixated on something that can’t change.  The most powerful part of you can respond with a simple, “Thank you for sharing”, and let it go.

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Inner Peace with 7 Keys to Transforming Thought – #4 Identifying Impact

4.  Willingness –In order for any transformation to occur, one MUST be WILLING to shift.  Someone can know they have a food, TV or alcohol addiction, but without a genuine WILLINGNESS to shift – NOTHING will disrupt the destructive behavior.  Such is the case with thoughts that one is consciously or unconsciously addicted to.  That authentic willingness works magic.

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